《新白娘子传奇》有感搞笑版版新白娘子传奇剧本旁白：longlongago，amovingstoryhappenedhere，it’saboutlove，life，andfun（音乐起，千年等一回）齐唱：waiting1000years1000yearsforachancewaiting1000yearsihavenoregretwhosaidthistomethatlovemeforeveronlyforyourwordsa~iwon’tberegretfulrainheartbrokewindiscryingsweetyloveseemstofallwestlakelikesmyteariwouldliketobefirewithyoua~waiting1000years1000yearsforachancewaiting1000yearsihavenoregretwaiting1000years1000yearsforachancewaiting1000years…1000（音乐，幻化人形）第一幕：断桥上旁白：thesnakewhiteandsnakegreenbecameintohumanbeingsthroughmagicpower青：“sister，isthistheworldofhumanbeing。howbeautiful。”白：“becareful，followme。”（闪电，下雨……）青：“whatheavyrain。”白：“don’tworry，wehaveanumbrella.”白素贞与许仙相遇……许：“oh，mygod。”白：“sohandsome…mr，yourclothiswet，nowihaveanumbrella，letusshareone.”许。“oh，thankyou，lovinggirl.whatgoodweather，wouldyouliketowalkwithme。”白：“ok，let’sgo.”青：“sister，sister，let’sgotogether.”白：“don’tyouseei’mbusy。go。”青：“ifeelratherhelpless，whensheseesomehandsomemen，sheofftengivemethecoldshoulder.”许：“yourname。”白：“suzhen”第1页共5页许：“ineversawagirlmorebeatuifulthanyou，you’readeadringerformymother，oh，sorry，imean，whenisawyou，idon’tknowwhattosay…”白：“stopbeatingaroundthebushandsaywhatyouwanttosay.”许：“doyouwanttomarrywithme。”白：“yes，ido，xianggong。”许：“wonderful。afterwetietheknot，we’llhaveahoneymoon.”（二人离去）青：“sister，sister。”第二幕：旁白：fromthenon，misswhitemissgreenandxuxianlivedahappylife，theyofftenchewthefat，andburnedthecandleatbothends.untilsuddenlyoneday，missgreenheardthatthemonkfahaiwouldcome.青：“sister，whatareyoudoinghere。”白：“xuxianhadn’twakeup，igetoutofbedonthewrongside.i’mthinkingaboutourfuture.”青：“i’veknownthatfahaiiscominghere”白：“oh，look，thesceneryisbeautiful，ifonly…”（音乐起，紧张）法海出现法海。“evilspirits。today，i’llsubdueyou。ladywhite，youhavenochancetoescape。”青：buddhistmonk，mindyourp’sandq’s，otherwise，i’llletyoudieugly.白：“go，i’llhithim.”（面向青）青：“sister，don’tdoit.”白：“keepback，don’tcomeanycloser。”青：“comeon，justgivemeyourhand.”（二人伸出手，音乐起，悲情）旁白：fahaiwasabouttotamemisswhite，missgreenwasfeelinganxious.青：“odukei。i’mnothiscompetitor，imustgoaway，otherwise，whocansavemysister。”第三幕：（音乐起）许仙：第2页共5页“ihaveadreamthatonedayicangetambadegreeinharward，ihaveadream，thatonedayicouldgetmarriedwithfurongjiejie…ihaveadream…”青：“xu，xuxian”许仙：“oh，youlookbeautifultoday，whatcanidoforyou。”（抓住小青的手）青（挣脱）：“terrible，soterrible，sisterandifightedwithamonk.shegottheshortendofthestickandwascaught.getit。”许：“oh，what。whereisshe。”青：“followme，quickly。”第四幕许仙。“fahai，comeout。”法海：“who’scallingme。today’syoungmenismoreandmoreimpolite。”许仙：“monk，givemywifeback”法海：“emituofo，shanzaishanzai，yourwifeisamonster”许仙：“monk，idon’tknowtheropesyet.who’smonster。ionlyknow，suzhenismywife.”法海：“ok，iwillshowyouhernature”（法海从包里拿出照妖镜，对准白素贞，白蛇倒下）（神雕侠侣音乐起）许仙。“areyoureallyamonster。”白：“yes，ihadcheatedyou，i’mamonster.”周围：“killher，killher”许仙：“shutup。”“yes，sheisamonster，sheshouldbekilled，butasherhu...
