英文简历中不该出现的话致命的大错"Finished8thinmyhighschoolgraduatingclassof10.""Qualifications:Noeducationorexperience.""Iamrelativelyintelligent,obedientandloyalasapuppy.""Mycompensationshouldbeatleastequaltomyage.""ReasonforLeaving:IthadtodowiththeIRS,FBIandSEC.""FiredbecauseIfoughtforlowerpay.""Sizeofemployer:Verytall,probablyover6'5"."Pleasedisregardtheenclosedresume-itisterriblyoutofdate.""ReasonforLeaving:Mybosssaidtheendoftheworldisnear.""ReasonforLeaving:Theownergavenewmeaningtotheword'paranoia.'Iprefertoelaborateprivately."打字错误与语法错误"Herearemyqualificationsforyoutooverlook.""Strengths:Abilitytomeetdeadlineswhilemaintainingcomposer.""Iamarabidtypist.""WorkHistory:Performedbrainwavetests,1879-1981.""Afterreceivingadvicefromseveraldifferentangels,Ihavedecidedtopursueanewlineofwork.""Accountingcleric.""Asindicted,Ihaveoverfiveyearsofexperienceanalyzinginvestments.""Suspectedtograduateearlynextyear.""Disposedof$2.5billioninassets.""Provenabilitytotrackdownandcorrecterrors.""Accomplishments:Oversightofentiredepartment."用心爱心专心"Amaperfectionistandrarelyifeverforgetdetails.""Accomplishments:Completed11yearsofhighschool."不应有的幽默"Note:Keepthisresumeontopofthestack.Useallotherstoheatyourhouse.""Assistedindailypreparationoflargequantitiesofconsumableitemsinafast-pacedsetting."(Translation:Short-ordercook.)"Butwait...there'smore.Yougetallthisbusinessknowledgeplusagraspofmarketingthatissecondnature.""Ihaveanexcellenttrackrecord,althoughIamnotahorse.""Myfortunecookiesaid,'Yournextinterviewwillresultinajob'-andIlikeyourcompanyinparticular.""Title:Anotherresumefromthe'ProfilesinExcellence'series.""AlsoKnownAs:Mr.Productivity,Mr.Clever,Mr.Fix-it.""Trustworthyreferencesavailableuponrequest-ifIgivethemafewbucks.""Let'smeetsoyoucan'ooh'and'ahh'overmyexperience."用心爱心专心