书面表达专题(四)学生习作点评(一)实现有效的沟通，建立良好的人际关系，不仅要善于言表、更要学会倾听。请你根据下表中所提供的信息，写“一篇题为BeingaGoodListener”的英文演讲稿。为何倾听表示尊重，增进理解，建立良好的人际关系谁来倾听家长倾听孩子理解孩子，消除代沟，……老师倾听学生了解学生，满足需求，……同学相互倾听增进友谊，互帮互学，……怎样倾听(请考生联系自己拟定内容，列举两至三点。)注意：1.对所给要点，逐一陈述，适当发挥，不要简单翻译。2．词数150左右。开头和结尾已经写好，不计入总词数。3．演讲稿中不得提及考生所在学校及本人姓名。Goodafternoon，everyone!Thetopicofmyspeechtodayis“BeingaGoodListener”．_____________________________________________Thankyouforyourlistening![学生习作]Goodafternoon，everyone!Thetopicofmyspeechtodayis“BeingaGoodListener”．Goodlisteningcanalwaysshowrespect，promoteunderstanding，andimproveinterpersonalrelationship.Manypeoplesuggestthatparentsshouldlistenmoretotheirchildren，sotheywillunderstandthembetter，andfinditeasytonarrowthegenerationgap；teachersshouldlistenmoretotheirstudents，thentheycanmeettheirneedsbetter，andplacethemselvesinagoodrelationshipwiththeirstudents；studentsshouldlistenmoretotheirclassmates，thustheywillhelpandlearnfromeachother，andafriendshipislikelytobeformed.WhatIwanttostressisthateachofusshouldlistenmoretoothers.Showyourrespectandneverstopotherstilltheyfinishtheirtalk；showyouareinterestedbyasupportivesilenceoraknowingsmile；beopenmindedtodifferentopinionseventhoughyoudon'tlikethem.Inaword，goodlisteningcanreallyenableustogetclosertoeachother.Thankyouforyourlistening![教师点评]①“”文章开门见山，点明为何倾听，并且运用了并列谓语动词来表达。②“”“在谁来倾听一部分，作者运用并列的parentsshouldlisten...；teachersshouldlisten...；studentsshouldlisten...”，使文章读来琅琅上口，很有气势。③“”在怎样倾听这一部分，作者提出了三点建议。本段首先运用what引导的主语从句；其次用了三个并列的祈使句，符合演讲稿的语言特点；最后，以inaword作出总结。总之，文章不管是从结构上，还是从语言上，都不愧为一篇佳作。(二)Directions：WriteanEnglishcompositioninabout100to120wordsaccordingtothepointsgiveninChinese.1．我最难忘的一课。2．具体说明为什么难忘。3．感想。________________________________________________________________________[学生习作]Onmystudyway①，a②Englishclassmakesadeepimpressiononmeandisremian③inmymemory.Atthattime，I'mnotinterestedinEnglishandalwaysdoothersomething④inEnglishclasses.However，thisEnglishclassmakesmechangemymindaboutEnglish.TheEnglishteacher'slectureattractsmedeeply.Sheopensadoorforme，make⑤merealizeEnglishisveryimportantandinteresting.Shegivesmeenoughconfidencelearn⑥Englishwell.Inaword，thisclasschangesmylifeinsomeway.Therefore，IswearImustlearnEnglishwellandIcan.[教师点评]本文汉语式英语较多，出现了许多时态错误。既然是“”记叙难忘的一课，应以一般过去时为主。本文除最后一句外，其他各句的时态均应改为过去时态。①此处为汉语式表达，应改为Inmystudylife/career。②冠词使用错误，a应改为an。③remain为系动词，故应将isremain改为remains。④“”此处表示其他事情，应用somethingelse或otherthings。⑤此处应用现在分词短语作结果状语，故make应改为making。⑥此处应用不定式作目的状语，learn前加to。
