Whereistheegg?Teacher:Canyoumakeasentencewiththeword"egg"?Student:Yes.Iateapieceofcakeyesterday.Teacher:Thenwhereisthe“egg"?Student:Inthecake,Sir.鸡蛋在哪里?老师:你能用“鸡蛋”一词造句吗?学生:可以。我昨天吃了一块蛋糕。老师:“鸡蛋”在哪?学生:在蛋糕里,先生Ivancamehomewithabloodynoseandhismotherasked,"Whathappened?""Akidbitme,"repliedIvan."Wouldyourecognizehimifyousawhimagain?"askedhismother."I'dknowhimanywhere,"saidIvan."Ihavehisearinmypocket."他的耳朵在我衣兜里伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问,“发生了什么事?”“一个男孩咬了我一口,”伊凡说。“再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问。“他走到哪里我都能认出他,”伊凡说,“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。”VirtueManyyearsafterreceivingmygraduatedegree,IreturnedtotheStateUniversityofNewYorkatBinghamtonasafacultymember.Onedayinacrowdedelevator,someoneremarkedonitsinefficiency.Isaidtheelevatorshadnotchangedinthe20yearssinceIbeganthereasastudent.Whenthedoorfinallyopened,Ifeltacompassionatepatonmyback,andturnedtoseeanelderlynunsmilingatme."You'llgetthatdegree,dear,"shewhispered."Perseveranceisavirtue."美德获取研究生学位多年以后,我回到位于宾翰顿的纽约州立大学当教员。一天,电梯里很拥挤,有人抱怨电梯效率太低。我说自我在那里当学生起,20年来电梯一直没有换过。最后当电梯门打开时,我感到有人在我的背上同情地拍了一下,回过头来我看到一位年长的修女正在朝我微笑。“你会拿到学位的,亲爱的,”她低声说道:“坚持不懈是一种美德。”Difference"Icanalwaystellagraduateclassfromanundergraduateclass,"observedtheinstructorinoneofmygraduateengineeringcoursesatCaliforniaStateUniversityinLosAngeles."WhenIsay,'Goodafternoon,'theundergraduatesrespond,'Goodafternoon."Butthegraduatestudentsjustwriteitdown."区别“研究生班和本科生很容易就能区别开来,”在洛杉矶加利福利亚州立大学给我们研究生上工程学课的老师如此说。“我说‘下午好’,本科生们回答说‘下午好’。研究生们则把我说的话记在笔记本上。”FlunkingMathMyson,whomadethedean'slistinhisfreshmanyearatBallStateUniversityinMuncie,Ind.,calledhomeafewweeksafterstartinghissophomoreyearasapsychologystudent."Mom,"hesaidexcitely,"Ihavefoundtheanswertosurvivingcollege!Itisn'tthegradesthataresoimportant,butthequalityofwhatislearnedandhowitisappliedtodailylife.I'mluckytobehavingthesewonderfulexperiences!""Andjustwhatdoesthismean?"Iasked."I'mflunkingmath,"hereplied.数学没及格我儿子是印第安那市曼西尔波州立大学的学生,大学一年级就上了系主任的名单第二年他学心理学,刚几个星期他就给家里打了个电话。“妈妈,”他激动地说:“我找到了如何在大学里生存下去的答案!重要的不是分数,而是具备将学到的知识应用于日常生活的素质。我很幸运地有了这种奇妙的经历。”“你到底是什么意思?”我问道。“我数学没及格。”他回答说。Part-timeJobWhenmysonwasahign-schoolsophomore,hegotapart-timejobsackinggroceriesatasupermarket.Hecamehomeallsmiles."Howwasyourfirstday?"Iasked."Itwasgreat,Dad,"hereplied."Igottotalktosomegood-lookinggirls."SinceStephenisnotverytalkative,Iasked,"Whatdidyousaytothem?""Doyoupreferpaperorplastic?"业余工作我儿子在一所中学读二年级时,在一家超级市场找到了一份包装商品的业余工作他满面笑容地回到了家。“第一天感觉如何?”我问。“好极了,爸爸。”他答道,“我跟许多漂亮的女孩子讲了话。”由于斯蒂芬不善言谈,我问道:“你跟他们说了些什么?”“你是喜欢纸包装还是塑料包装?”Keys?Kiss?AfriendofminewasgivinganEnglishlessontoaclassofadultwhohadrecentlycometoliveintheUnitedStates.Afterplacingquiteanumberofeverydayobjectsonatable,heaskedvariousmembersoftheclasstogiveh...