2015届高三自主练习一（Pressure）作文讲评（教师版）（2014/9/9）编辑陈建苏审核花海燕一、原题呈现阅读下面的短文，然后按照要求写一篇150词左右的英语短文。Manystudentsfailtoperformwellinanexamnotbecausetheylackability,butbecauseoftheuniquepressureoftheexamroom—thetenseatmosphere,thetickingclockonthewall,theteacherwalkingaround,andthethoughtthattheirfuturewillbedecidedbytheexam.It’snotjuststudentswhowillfacepressure.Humanbeingsarecompetitiveanimalsandwedecidetoevaluateeachother,whetherinexams,injobinterviewsorevenonromanticdates,soallofusoccasionallygetnervous.Removingpressurefromlifeisanimpossibledream.However,therearesomewayswhichcanhelpreduceourpressure.Itturnsoutthatwearefarmorelikelytoovercomethepressurewhenweareasfamiliaraspossiblewiththesituationweareabouttoface.Ofcourse,evenwhenwearewell-prepared,wemaystillfeelnervous,butatleastwewillbemoreequippedtodealwithournervousnessthanifwehavefailedtoprepare.Furthermore,wemayalsobenefitfromremindingourselvesthatthebigmomentisnotthatbigafterallfromadifferentperspective.Evenahugeexamisnotasimportantasalovingfamily,orgoodhealth.【写作内容】1.以约30个词概括这段短文的内容；2.然后以约120个词谈谈你对“压力”的看法，内容包括：（1）正确面对压力的重要性;（2）作为高三的学生，你通常面临哪些压力？（3）你在生活和学习中应对压力的措施。二、表达难点及评析（1）正确面对压力的重要性；（评析：该部分学生似乎无话可说，而且表达无序）（2）作为高三的学生，你通常面临哪些压力？（评析：该部分欠高级、流畅的表达形式）三、文章结构和难点击破（文章分成四段，也可将Para2和Para3合并为一段）ParaOne:概括短文大意解析：该部分应包括1.每个人（不仅仅是学生）都会承受一定的压力；2.作者给出一些应对建议议论文的概括步骤：第一步：找出各段主题句①Manystudentsfailtoperformwellinanexambecauseofpressure.②Humanbeingsincludingstudentswillfacepressure.③Therearesomewayswhichcanhelpreduceourpressure.第二步：对各段主题句进行提炼（不能用原文句子）第三步：基于短文，以作者的口吻进行概括，切勿以自己的观点概括Thewritermainlytellsusnotonlystudentsbutalsootherpeoplewillfeelstressedondifferentoccasions.Also,hegivessomesuggestionsonhowtoreducepressure.Accordingtothearticle,humanbeingsareallfullofpressure,studentsincluded.Italsoshowsussomewaysofreducingpressure.Notonlystudentsbutalsopeoplefromallwalksoflife(各行各业)constantlysufferfromunavoidablepressurefromlife,yetwecanreduceitbygettingpreparedforthecomingsituationorloweringtheemphasisofbigmomentsinmind.ParaTwo:正确面对压力的意义（不能写成压力的重要性而是正确面对压力的重要性）解析：该部分可以从压力存在的普遍性、不可避免性来说明采取积极态度面对压力的必要性；也可以正面、具体阐述对待压力应该采取怎样的态度及原因，表达中应注意寻找句与句之间的逻辑性。1参考表达：1.积极面对压力facepressurepositivelyandbravely2.对压力采取积极的态度take/have/adoptaproperattitudetowardspressure3.压力促使我们进步motivateustomakeprogress4.太多的压力会使我们崩溃toomuchpressuremakesusbreakdown5.采取措施来缓解压力takemeasurestoreducepressure连词成句：Sincepressureisunavoidable,learningtofaceitbravelyistheonlythingwecando；Otherwise,wewouldbedepressedandsuccesswouldalwaysbeoutofreach.（用since;otherwise;分词,虚拟语气造句）Itiswidelyacknowledgedthatpressureispartoflife,andmanythingscanaddtoourpressure.Ifwedon’thaveaproperattitudetowardsit,wewouldbreakdownfinally.Onthecontrary,ifdealtwithproperly,itwouldmotivateustomakemoreprogress.Sincetoomuchpressurehasbadeffect...
