《老友记》第一季第一集VIP免费

《老友记》第一季第一集（中央咖啡厅）没什么好说的！他只不过是我的同事There'snothingtotell.It'sjustsomeguyIworkwith.少来了，和你交往的男人…Comeon.You'regoingoutwithaguy.多多少少一定有点问题！There'sgottabesomethingwrongwithhim.他既驼背又戴假发？Sodoeshehaveahumpandahairpiece?等一下，他是不是会吃粉笔？Wait.Doesheeatchalk?我只是不希望你重蹈我和卡尔的覆辙Idon'twanthertogothroughwhatIwentthroughwithCarl.Oh.各位放轻松，这不算约会Okay,everybodyrelax.Thisisnotevenadate.不过是两个人一起出去吃晚餐而且不上床It'sjusttwopeoplegoingouttodinnerandnothavingsex.对我来说这就是约会Soundslikeadatetome.做了个梦，在中学时代我站在餐厅中央…I'mbackinhighschool,inthemiddleofthecafeteria...突然发现自己全身赤裸...andIrealizeI'mtotallynaked.对，没错我做过那样的梦Oh,yeah.I'vehadthatdream.我低头一看，看见有一个电话…ThenIlookdownandIrealizethereisaphone...在那里...there.而不是…没错Insteadof...That'sright!我没做过那样的梦没有Thatone,I'veneverhad.No.突然，那个电话响了Allofasudden,thephonestartstoring.结果是我妈妈打来的Anditturnsoutit'smymother.这非常奇怪因为她从来都不会打电话给我！Whichisvery,veryweirdbecauseshenevercallsme.嗨Hi.这家伙说〝嗨〞的时候我却想杀了我自己Thisguysays"hello,"Iwannakillmyself.你还好吧，亲爱的？Areyouokay,sweetie?我就感觉好像某人伸手进我的喉咙抓住我的小肠，从我的嘴里拉出来Ifeellikesomeonegrabbedmysmallintestine,pulleditoutofmymouth...再在我的脖子上打结…要吃饼干吗？...andtieditaroundmyneck.Cookie?卡萝今天搬走了她的东西Carolmovedherstuffouttoday.哦Oh.我给你拿杯咖啡谢谢Letmegetyousomecoffee.Thanks.呃Ew.Unh.不，不要！不要清理我的光环！No.No,don't!Stopcleansingmyaura.不要管我的光环，好吗？Justleavemyauraalone,okay?我会没事的，好吗？真的我希望她开心I'llbefine.Allright?Really.Ihopeshe'llbeveryhappy.不，你并不希望是的，我不希望！No,youdon't.No,Idon't.叫她去死，是她离开了我！Tohellwithher.Sheleftme!你从来都不知道她是女同性恋Andyouneverknewshewasalesbian.不知道！行了吧！No!Okay?为什么每个人老是要提出来？Whydoeseveryonekeepfixatingonthat?她都不知道，我又怎么会知道？Shedidn'tknow.HowshouldIknow?有时候我希望我是女同性恋…SometimesIwishIwasalesbian.我讲得很大声吗？DidIsaythatoutloud?没事的，罗斯你现在感到很痛苦Allright,Ross.Look,you'refeelingalotofpainrightnow.你很生气，很伤心You'reangry.You'rehurting.我能告诉你解决方法是什么吗？CanItellyouwhattheansweris?脱衣舞厅！Stripjoints!别这样，你单身了！有需求的！Comeon,you'resingle.Havesomehormones.我不想单身，好吗？See,butIdon'twanttobesingle,okay?我只想…再次结婚！Ijustwannabemarriedagain.而我只想要一百万美金！AndIjustwantamilliondollars!瑞秋！Rachel?噢，老天爷，摩妮卡感谢上帝！Oh,God,Monica!Hi!ThankGod!我刚到你那里去，而你不在那个拿着大锤子的家伙说Iwenttoyourbuildingandthisguywithahammersaid...你可能在这里你真在这里！...thatyoumightbehere,andyouare.你想喝点咖啡吗？无咖啡因的CanIgetyousomecoffee?Decaf.好了，各位，这位是瑞秋另一个林肯高中的幸存者Okay,everybody,thisisRachel,anotherLincolnHighsurvivor.这就是各位这是钱德、菲比Thisiseverybody.ThisisChandlerandPhoebe...乔伊，还有你还记得我哥哥罗斯吗？...andJoey.Andremembermybrother,Ross?当然，嘿！嘿Sure!Hey.嗨天啊Hi.Oh,God.那你现在可以告诉我们了吗还是说我们在等着四位湿漉的伴娘?Soyouwannatellusnow,orarewewaitingforfourwetbridesmaids?好吧，大概在婚礼前半个小时Oh,God!Well,itstartedaboutahalf-hourbeforethewedding.我在礼物间里Iwasinthisroomwithallthepresents...看着那个肉汁壶...andIwaslookingatthisgravyboat....