Book 3 Unit 1 Personality The Mis ery of Shy nes s Shyness is the cause of much unhappiness for a great many people. All kinds of people describe themselves as shy: short, tall, dull, intelligent, young, old, slim, overweight. Shy people are anxious and self-conscious; that is, they are excessively concerned with their own appearance and actions. Worrisome thoughts are constantly swirling in their minds: What kind of impression am I making? Do they like me? Do I sound stupid? I'm ugly. I'm wearing unattractive clothes. It is obvious that such uncomfortable feelings must affect people adversely. A person's self-concept is reflected in the way he or she behaves, and the way a person behaves affects other people's reactions. In general, the way people think about themselves has a profound effect on all areas of their lives. For instance, people who have a positive sense of self-worth or high self-esteem usually act with confidence. Because they have self-assurance, they do not need constant praise and encouragement from others to feel good about themselves. Self-confident people participate in life enthusiastically and spontaneously. They are not affected by what others think they "should" do. People with high self-esteem are not hurt by criticism; they do not regard criticism as a personal attack. Instead, they view a criticism as a suggestion for improvement. In contrast, shy people, having low self-esteem, are likely to be passive and easily influenced by others. They need reassurance that they are doing "the right thing". Shy people are very sensitive to criticism; they feel it confirms their inferiority. They also find it difficult to be pleased by compliments because they believe they are ...
